Hello Steven, Welcome to The Relatable Voice magazine. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself?
I am a New Yorker, having grown up in the Bronx, which was a great place to grow up because there were so many unique and funny individuals from so many different backgrounds. So, I have been simmering in this melting pot for so many years and now I have found that I can provide delicious meals through my story telling in the adult and kid books I have written. I describe in my bio as the “son of a Holocaust Survivor” (my mom) because that fact was always present in my household growing up. My mom did not say much about her experience in the Bergen Belsen camp, but said that when the British liberated the camp, she was found alive among the bones of the dead. So, having that as my background, it gave me my own survivor attitude. I am a cranky attorney who has written and taught negotiation so if you google my name and the word “negotiation”, I show up on the first page. If you google my name and “cranky”, I show up on the first 20 pages. Hopefully, that does not make people think that I am very cranky! I also run two hours almost every morning, and I tend to write in my head when I run. When I get back from the run, I just write it down.
You’ve been running marathons for 35 years. Besides running, what else do you like doing in your spare time?
I love cooking. That is definitely my cranky release from a long cranky day. It is where I have complete control, and I learned how to cook from my mom who was the world’s best cook. I also like to fly to England to check in on my amazing illustrator, Andy Case, who lives in Nottingham. He is a blessing that I wake up grateful for every day. The world’s older pub “Ye Olde Road to Jerusalem” is in Nottingham (Opened in 1139 AD), and it is definitely one of those places to go to before you die.
Your book, "Cranky Superpowers," is about effective crankiness. Can you tell us more about effective crankiness?
Effective crankiness is first having an understanding that we all get cranky, and I call it the “Common CrankaTsuris”. The second thing is to notice it, and slow it down. The third thing is about having empathy and knowing we all have our own personal kryptonite.
I always compare it to walking in somebody’s house, and they ask you to take off your shoes because they do not want to get dirt on the rug. But, while we are very mindful about not getting dirt on the rug, we have no problem getting dirt on each other.
Here is a funny true story that maybe I should not be telling. Many years ago, my brother and his wife flew to Florida to visit my parents. My father, who was a very ineffective cranky person, did not greet them by saying hello, so good to see you, but rather, he turned to my brother’s wife, and said “Phoey, you got fat!” All I can say is that it didn’t go well after that.
Is it possible to be cranky and Zen at the same time?
Yes. Try going to a silent retreat and sit on a cushion staring at a wall from 5:30 AM till about 9PM at night. That may make you cranky, but you are definitely finding yourself in the moment rather than thinking about the five million things you may have to do after the retreat is over.
Can you share some insights from your Zen practice that have shaped your perspective on life and writing?
My own personal thing is that it helps me focus on just making me. When I started meditation, I read a lot of books on Zen, and it was all about attaining enlightenment. But, I felt that the authors were always trying to get something, or always searching for something. One day, I just decided that my way of attaining enlightenment is to not seek it. I can stare at the blank wall, and that would be okay.
How do you balance your roles as an attorney, marathon runner, comedian, and writer?
They all complement each other. The cranky moments get inspired by the crazy stuff that happens during the day. The running helps me put the thoughts together, and give time for the characters to speak to me, and then, I just write it down.
What motivated you to start writing fiction for both children and adults?
I wrote my first book The Last Surviving Dinosaur after my wife had a cranky episode when we were in Rome. She became my muse for the TyrantoCrankaTsuris, the smallest but most dangerous dinosaur on the planet, and how all humans descended from this cranky dinosaur. One reviewer complained that I did not write enough about overcoming crankiness, but the point I was making was to recognize and embrace our crankiness. That got me going on writing about effective crankiness.
What inspired the creation of your latest book, "Cranky Superpowers”?
I started writing A Grownup Guide to Effective Crankiness as a “Strategy Guide” on using our crankiness effectively, but the more I was writing, the more I got into fun story telling. Once I was done finishing up that book, I felt that was such a fun avenue to explore to share lessons on how crankiness can be our superpower.
As a crankiness expert, what strategies do you recommend for managing emotions and improving communication with others?
There are so many! I wrote two books on that! I will give you one. Just giving permission to be cranky. It is called empathy and appreciation. I say that in very relationship, you should allow for 20% crazy, 5% insane, and 75% normal. It is counterintuitive because it gives permission, and reminds us not to overreact to our loved ones’ crankiness. By giving permission, there is appreciation, and love in return.
I love when people say that the stories stick with them, long after they finished the book. I believe that humor can be the greatest teacher because it puts a light on the absolute absurdity that is life. Also, I love to turn things upside down. It leads to humorous situations, and actually helps us see more clearly. As an example, in my book, I have a chapter that looks at the phrase “can’t make this stuff up”. We typically think on the crazy stuff that happens when we say that. However, it is really the Groundhog Day same boring routine we may have day in and day out that is really the stuff we can’t make up, and perhaps, we should actually try to make stuff up.
Can you share with us about your next book in the Snoodles series?
The next book “Snoodles in Space, Episode 2: The Zoodles Strike Back” is about to be released. It is a take on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory except that I take the spoiled and a bit over-zealous kids and make them heroes at the end. You think about the original story and the media circus that you saw in the original movie. I pictured a lot of negative press, and some shaming. That is why I had to flip the story so these poor kids who made some bad decisions end up doing okay.
What advice do you have for aspiring writers looking to explore themes of resilience and acknowledgment in their work?
I think it is great if you can start with your own personal experiences. If you have that in your own life, whatever you end up writing will sound more genuine and real. It also will be the source of inspiration. In my books, I create stories, but I include my own unique experiences.
What do you hope readers take away from your books?
While I strive to be as ridiculous as possible, I am very serious with the messages I hope to convey. I read reviews of Cranky Superpowers and when they say that the stories stick with you, and are transformative, I do not think I can ask for anything more for what I hope the readers will get out of the book.
(Interview published on The Relatable Voice Magazine - April 2024)
Steven Joseph is a first-generation American, the son of a Holocaust Survivor, a masterful attorney, seasoned negotiator, engaging speaker, award-winning author, and a long-distance runner having completed 53 marathons which include five-times at Boston and 18-time at the NYC Marathon. With a sharp sense of humor that has kept him schuckling back and forth at countless synagogues, he’s also spent many years sitting in stillness on a cushion, trying desperately to empty his mind while staring at a blank white wall at the Village Zendo. Despite his extensive life experience, he remains wise enough to acknowledge that he hasn't figured everything out — except, perhaps, for the art of effective crankiness.
Steven’s books include The Last Surviving Dinosaur: The TyrantoCrankaTsuris, The Crankatsuris Method: A Grownup Guide to Effective Crankiness, and the "Snoodles" series, which includes Snoodles, Kidoodles, Poodles, and Lots and Lots of Noodles and Snoodles in Space: A Snoodle, The Zoodle Kidoodles, and One Happy Schmoodle. His latest book, Cranky Superpowers: Life Lessons Learned from the Common CrankaTsuris Chronicles, delivers more of his signature wisdom as he continues to explore and celebrate the cranky corners of life.
Despite his long partnership with therapists and his time spent as an attorney, Steven remains grounded and approachable with a wit that is as quick as his award-winning blog is insightful. Don’t believe us? See for yourself when you visit Steven Joseph’s website.
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